Rules of Communication With Teenagers

Teenage is a very important phase of your child's life. Iteveryday with your teenager, when you can discuss
is time in their life when they are in the state ofthe day or just the latest developments in the world of
confusion and they do not know what they want andsport, science, electronics or whatever interests your
what they need. During this time sometimes they justteenager can help to develop the rapport. The more
need a empathetic ear to listen to them and give themeasily you can strike a conversation with your
support. As parents, you need to realise this and giveteenager, the more open they will be with you and the
that time and attention to your child, so that they canmore trust you can develop in the relationship.
speak up what is in their mind and just reduce someYou need to have at least one face-to-face
of the emotional burden they might be feeling. Belowdiscussion with your child when you are not
are some of the rules of communication you need tomulti-tasking. Try and select a topic - "What did you do
use in order to take your relationship with yourtoday?"; "How can we change the room set-up?";
teenager to the next level and make them feel"How are his/her friends doing?" etc. Be genuine about
confident about their own selves:the topics and show an interest in what they are
Recognise opportunities to talk: Try and find time tosaying. In these discussions, ask as many open ended
talk to your teenager. It need not be a formal setting orquestions as you can but allow your child to do most
planned time. It can be a small chat you can have withof the talking and express their feelings, experiences
them while driving back from school or while washingand thoughts.
up plates at home. Get some form of informal,Put yourself aside: Do not bore your child with details
non-serious and effortless communication flowing withabout your day or certain events in your life, if you see
them.that they are not interested. You will probably be
Choose time with care: One mistake that many peopletempted to try and impose your views onto your teen
make in teenage parenting is to try and talk when itat some time, but give your child space and support to
suits them and not when it suits their teen. If your sonformulate their own ideas about the world - they will
is in the middle of trying to beat a high score on hisbecome a much stronger person for doing so.
latest game, or your daughter is just leaving the house,In the book "Solving Teenage Problems", several tips
they are not going to want to talk! So pick your timeto improve communication have been discussed. The
with care, even if you have to be a little creative aboutbook also provides two models on communication,
creating an opportunity.which can help parents to structure difficult
Provide for daily communication: While it is great toconversations and have a successful and effective
have informal and effortless communication, it doescommunication with your teenager.
not undermine the need for having a quiet hour