| BookWire's "Year in Reviews Magazine," December | | | | management expects of you. It's a duty that you |
| 2006 issue, lists a review of my book "Help Me With | | | | cannot ignore if you want to keep your job. |
| My Teenager! A Step-by-step Guide for Parents that | | | | Parenting your teenager is very similar to being a |
| Works." | | | | manager. However, instead of guiding and assisting |
| All in all a very positive review, the reviewer states: | | | | strangers, you are supporting and helping you own |
| "Help Me With My Teenager!" speaks in a clear and | | | | child. Are you sure you want to leave your teenager |
| understandable language directly to parents. Some | | | | to fend on his own because you're a "already busy |
| techniques, such as stopping whatever you're doing | | | | parent?" |
| when your kid is ready to talk, will be difficult for | | | | Busy parents are also stressed parents. We cannot |
| already busy parents to implement. However, the | | | | escape the duties of our individual jobs, so we try to |
| extra effort promises to pay excellent dividends in | | | | keep additional pressures at bay if we can. It's so easy |
| form of a healthier, more supportive relationship." | | | | to tell your teen that you really don't have time for him |
| I never said it was easy or that no effort on the | | | | now. He'll say "OK" and walk away -- you're ready to |
| parent's part is necessary. As a matter of fact, | | | | continue with whatever you were doing. By avoiding to |
| throughout my book I emphasize that parents will need | | | | listen to your teen when he needed your opinion or |
| to utilize a lot of self control and implement strategies | | | | help you saved yourself five minutes. |
| before responding to their teen's actions or questions. | | | | For your teenager, however, these five minutes would |
| The statement "stopping whatever you're doing will be | | | | have meant getting your help and advice instead of |
| difficult to implement for already busy parents" touches | | | | being left to deal with his issue on his own. They would |
| on one of the most important factors when it comes | | | | have meant that he is important enough for you to |
| to parenting your teenager. | | | | stop what you're doing and help him, instead of being |
| To put this issue into perspective, here is the following | | | | scolded for interrupting your busy life. They would |
| analogy: | | | | have given him the security blanket he needs as he is |
| Consider you are working for a large company, | | | | trying to gain confidence in himself and his decisions. |
| managing a department of several employees. You | | | | There is no fear of a bad review when it comes to |
| double task by managing your group as well as | | | | your teen -- or is there? If your teen has to deal with |
| working on projects assigned to you by your | | | | an issue without your support and fails -- do you yell at |
| supervisor. | | | | him? Do you add insult to injury by telling him he should |
| What do you do when one of your employees | | | | have come to you, forgetting that you told him you |
| interrupts you with a question while you are focusing | | | | had no time and sent him away when he did? |
| on your project? - You stop. Not because you want | | | | You want your teen to stay out of trouble and you |
| to, but because you have to. Your management | | | | want your teen to succeed. He cannot do that alone, |
| position requires it. If you choose to tell your employee: | | | | he needs your guidance and support. Your time is |
| "Come back later" or "I really cannot deal with this right | | | | needed, not just for a better relationship with your |
| now" you are not doing your job as a manager and | | | | teenager, but for your teen to resist peer pressure, |
| your review will reflect this. | | | | stay out of trouble and not start to drink, use drugs or |
| Furthermore, your employees will stop coming to you | | | | get depressed. To resist and cope with the pressures |
| with their questions, deal with their problems the best | | | | of growing up, your teen needs to know that he |
| way the see how, and eventually your department will | | | | matters in your life and that he can come to you for |
| be in a state of complete chaos. Your boss wants to | | | | help and advice. Your teen needs you - even if he |
| speak with you for a moment behind closed doors? | | | | acts otherwise. |
| There is a very good chance you saw that coming. | | | | As 2007 commences, let us add another New Year's |
| Being a manager, guiding other employees so they will | | | | resolution to our list -- Take Time For Your Teen! |
| succeed and excel in what they're doing is what upper | | | | |