| In 1954, Torrance, California family counsellor Dorothy | | | | children without having made the conscious decision to |
| Law Nolte dashed off a poem in order to meet a | | | | do, loving those children and to remaining in touch with |
| deadline for her weekly newspaper column. Called | | | | the idea that parenting styles effect the development |
| "Children Learn What They Live," its nineteen lines | | | | of those children are choices they can make each and |
| went on to be translated into thirty-five languages. It | | | | every day. |
| was distributed to millions of new parents by a baby | | | | Children are terrific observers, and one of the benefits |
| products company. And in 2005, Crown Prince | | | | of knowing that parenting style affect development is |
| Naruhito of Japan said he was raising his | | | | in realizing that children mirror what they observe. A |
| three-year-old daughter according to its positive | | | | child who experiences positive reinforcement from his |
| verses. | | | | or her parents will learn to be supportive and |
| What Dr. Nolte was expressing in her simple way over | | | | encouraging of others. In a world where no one ever |
| half a century ago is simply this: parenting styles affect | | | | feels valued enough, raising children who truly |
| development. Positive parenting styles affect | | | | appreciate the efforts of those around them is a high |
| development positively, and negative parenting styles | | | | calling indeed. |
| affect development negatively. | | | | On the other hand, negative parenting styles affect |
| Positive parenting styles are those which not only | | | | development by controlling through intimidation and |
| notice, but acknowledge and praise the good | | | | ridicule. While they may, in the short term, achieve the |
| behaviors in children. Children who receive this sort of | | | | obedience that a parent desires, in the long term they |
| affirmation develop confidence, high self-esteem, and | | | | will teach the child to fear authority and to bully others. |
| an eagerness to engage in more of the behavior | | | | And they only work for as long as the parent can |
| which will pay off in more praise. | | | | physically intimidate the child. |
| Negative parenting styles affect development in just | | | | New parents would do very well to reflect on how |
| the opposite way. Negative parents jump on all the | | | | their own parent's parenting styles affected their |
| mistakes which children cannot avoid making, | | | | development and to honestly assess what they wish |
| correcting them harshly and even humiliating the | | | | had been done differently. Being aware that they may |
| children. Even worse, a negative parenting style simply | | | | put to much weight on their own upbringing as a guide |
| takes for granted what a child does right or well, and | | | | to raising their children is a tremendous first in avoiding |
| never offers praise of encouragement because good | | | | a parenting style which will have a negative effect on |
| behavior is simply expected. | | | | their affect their children's development. |
| Parenting styles affect development for either good or | | | | Parenting styles affect development; children learn |
| bad, and parents need to know that a conscious | | | | what they live; and the simple poem of five decades |
| decision in favor of a positive parenting style is not only | | | | ago is as true today as it was when it emerged from |
| an option, but a responsibility. While many people have | | | | Dorothy Law Nolte's typewriter. |