Parenting Advice - What to Do When Your Child is Talking Back

Are these things you hear from your child when youteaching your child how to speak.
tell or ask them to do something?It's not your fault that you're talking that way to them...
- No!You're trying to juggle a million things and get dinner
- You can't make me!ready and make sure that the rice doesn't burn and
- I don't want to!then your kid comes in and wants to go play and you
- Go away!just kind of snap at him without thinking about it.
- I won't do it!I totally get how it happens...
Hearing things like this from your little one can haveBut when you're dealing with a child who is frequently
you feeling embarrassed, sad, angry, andtalking back, as the adult, it's so important that you bring
hopeless...Nobody likes to be shouted at and it can beyour attention to your own style of talking to your child.
especially painful and irritating to be yelled at by a child.It's amazing how quickly kids will pick up language and
Usually, parents and teachers who are dealing withwords from those around them... especially you as their
back talk feel out of control and helpless aboutparent or teacher.
changing the situation...So if you want to combat the talking back in your
So here's something you can do as the adult to helphome or classroom, start being more mindful of how
your child or student start being more respectfulyou talk to your child.
toward you...Notice how snapping, "Not right now - dinner's almost
It's something totally within your control...ready," isn't much different than your child saying, "No,
It's not a magic pill, but it WILL eventually have theI'm in the middle of my show" when you ask him to put
desired effect that you want.on his shoes and get ready to go to the store with
Here's the scoop...you.
If you want your child to start being more respectful toOr your student saying, "I don't want to do Circle Time."
you, you have to start being more respectful to yourInstead of talking back to your child or student, try to
child or student.connect with him and respond more politely.
I'm not talking about giving in to whatever they want"I know you want to go outside right now. Dinner's
and saying yes to everything that they ask for.almost ready. Let's do something fun after dinner."
That's not respecting them... that's just rolling over and"Yeah, playing outside does sound like fun. Let's wait
playing dead!until after dinner and then we can play outside for 10
What I mean by respecting your child more is for oneminutes."
thing, not talking back to THEM."I understand that you don't want to do Circle Time
So when your child asks if they can go play outsideand you'd rather stay where you are. Will you come sit
and you snap back, "Not now - dinner's almost ready,"next to me?
that's a form of talking back TO THEM and it's