Parenting Adolescents - How to Talk to Your Teenager - Teenage Parenting is Tough!

Parenting adolescents is a huge challenge, but withquestions you want answered, when they are actually
communication, teenage parenting can be made easiertalking to you about something else will make them
for you and your child. One of the hardest things infeel unwanted and unimportant which will make
parenting adolescents is communicating in the rightteenage parenting even more difficult for you.
way. Here are some ways that teenage parenting canLastly, think about how you react. Show your teen the
be made a little less stressful:same respect you would show other people. Give
Firstly, recognize opportunities to talk. Whether you'reyour full attention to the conversation, don't try and
driving your teen somewhere or sharing the washingmulti-task and don't veer off into talking about your day
up, you have a chance to talk. The pressure of 'havingif they seem bored listening to it. You will probably be
to have a chat' isn't there and you may find that it is atempted to try and impose your views onto your teen
time your teen can open up to you. One mistake thatat some time, but give your child space and support to
many people make in teenage parenting is to try andformulate their own ideas about the world - they will
talk when it suits them and not when it suits their teen.become a much stronger person for doing so.
If your son is in the middle of trying to beat a highParenting adolescents can be very hard when they do
score on his latest game, or your daughter is justrebel against the 'family ideals' and it is likely to happen
leaving the house, they are not going to want to talk!to some extent at some point. However, if you do
So pick your time, even if you have to be a littlehear something you don't like, don't jump to conclusions
creative about creating an opportunity - parentingand assume the worst. Take a deep breath and say
adolescents isn't just about authority, it's aboutyou will talk about it later if you feel you are going to
creativity too!react in an angry way. Teenage parenting is stressful
Secondly, think about what you say. Everybodyenough, without knee-jerk reactions making things
knows teenagers who answer in words of oneworse.
syllable, or who grunt responses. Don't ask them yesIt is difficult to remember that our parents had the
or no questions or they will continue to do it. Ask themsame problems parenting adolescents as we do
open ended questions like, 'What happened at thetoday, but they did. If you manage to communicate
football match?" You may still get a "nothing" or an "Iwith your teenager you are doing really well. Try and
don't know" answer but at least it increases thethink about ways you can talk to your teenager - are
chances of a longer reply and a continuingthere activities you can do together? Think about what
conversation. Don't try and turn the conversation roundyou say to them - try and see things through their
to suit your needs. Parenting adolescents is hardeyes. Think about how you react - keep calm. Bear
enough without trying to create more problems.these three things in mind and teenage parenting may
Bombarding them with demands, instructions, orjust get a little less fraught.