| When you hear the phrase, 'guerrilla parenting | | | | watching an imaginary fly going around the room. |
| techniques', what images come to mind? I see a big, | | | | Watch it land somewhere, sneak up on it and pop it in |
| broad shouldered soldier, dressed in green fatigues, | | | | your mouth. Move your tongue around the inside of |
| with brown paint on his face. His chest is crisscrossed | | | | your cheek like the fly is trying to get out and let it |
| with ammunition for the guns strapped on his legs. He's | | | | loose and start over and/or turn to your child and say, |
| quietly hidden under the cover of trees, waiting to snipe | | | | "I'm sorry, were you saying something?" |
| away at the enemy with maximum impact. | | | | If you have a child showing a negative, "snotty" |
| The word 'guerilla', was a term borrowed from Spanish | | | | attitude, walk by and hand your child a tissue. Don't say |
| used to describe small combat groups. Guerilla | | | | anything, just hand it to the child. If he or she asks what |
| warfare operates with small, mobile and flexible | | | | it's for, just say, "I thought you might need it." See if |
| combat groups without a front line. It seems | | | | your child figures it out without your help. |
| appropriate to use this term when discussing new | | | | What about the child who likes to say, "That's stupid." If |
| parenting techniques for parents. I'm going to describe | | | | you child says this phrase a lot, say, "No, this is stupid," |
| what guerilla parenting techniques are; what they aren't; | | | | and do something really crazy like walk backwards |
| give some examples and then explain why they are | | | | with your head between your legs. Then, walk away |
| helpful to parents and children. | | | | and leave the child wondering what that was all about. |
| Just like in guerilla warfare, it's always a great thing to | | | | The more you do these activities, the more fun you |
| respond to your children in ways totally different than | | | | begin to have. |
| what they expect. It catches them off guard and they | | | | Guerilla parenting techniques are helpful to parents and |
| start to watch you and listen better. Sometimes, you | | | | children because the parents don't get upset and yell |
| come in quietly, interact with them in new and | | | | at their children. Instead, they remain calm and in |
| unexpected ways, and then retreat quickly without a | | | | control. For some families, that would really shock the |
| word. The less you say the better. You provide natural | | | | kids into watching their parents (What happened to my |
| consequences instead of punishment; you make the | | | | mom? I'm not able to get her upset and get my way |
| consequence fit the crime. If a child is fighting with a | | | | anymore). Parents change the dance steps with their |
| sibling, perhaps that child has to do his sibling's chores | | | | children; they move in new and unexpected ways, |
| the next day to make up for his negative actions, | | | | which throws the children off guard; it can shift tension |
| instead of being sent to his room. Successful parents | | | | and anger to silence and laughter instantly. Finally, You |
| are fully armed with unexpected ways to handle | | | | use natural consequences for misbehavior instead of |
| frustrating behaviors. | | | | punishment, so the children have to look at how they |
| Guerilla parenting techniques do not involve giving | | | | created their predicaments instead of getting angry at |
| severe consequences. They aren't needed. It is the | | | | their parents for punishing them |
| certainly of a consequence coming that has impact | | | | In summation, you've read my explanation of guerilla |
| with children. Therefore, physical punishment, especially | | | | parenting techniques, as well as examples of what |
| when given to control, manipulate or to demonstrate | | | | they are aren't. Some examples of these techniques |
| power would not fall under this category of parenting | | | | were given before I addressed how these techniques |
| styles. Making children feel they are wrong, belittling | | | | are helpful to parents who are successful with their |
| them and/or putting them down would also not be an | | | | children. Now, when I hear the phrase, 'guerrilla |
| example of guerrilla parenting techniques. | | | | parenting techniques', I envision a picture of a strong, |
| Let's look at three examples of guerilla parenting | | | | loving, confident and spontaneous parent who isn't |
| techniques. I found them in Brita St. Clair's little book | | | | afraid to have fun while catching his or child off guard; |
| called 99 Ways to drive Your Child Sane. The first is in | | | | a parent who knows how to ambush children into |
| response to a child who constantly chatters. Start | | | | behaving respectfully and responsibly at home. |