First Born Child

Having a child is an incredibly exciting thing. Before yourwell-behaved child.
child was born, you probably spent so many hoursYou may be tempted to spent time trying to make
thinking about what he or she would look like, pickingyour child feel better about him or herself, but focus
out names, and thinking about all fun experiences you'dinstead on giving your child to the tools to succeed.
share. But then your child was born, and things mayTeach him or her problem solving skills and
not have been exactly as you hoped - he or she actsaccountability. Run a structured household, and don't
out more than you expected. It seems that your childspend time trying to control your home - you are the
has a very defiant attitude.parent so you should always be in control.
Many parents have trouble dealing with a defiant childSome may say that children won't act out if you only
because they have a hard time realizing that he or shetry to raise their self-esteem and make them feel
isn't the perfect angel they imagined. They may havebetter about themselves. However, across my years
expected great behavior and manners, but wereof experience as a parent, teacher, and coach, I've
taken by surprise when their child misbehavedfound the truth to lie elsewhere.
frequently.Children build their self-esteem by accomplishing goals
The first thing that parents need to do in this situation isand doing the right thing. To help a defiant child learn to
understand that they're not dealing with the perfectbehave, teach him or her problem-solving skills as well
angel they hoped for, but instead they face theas the consequences of acting out.
problem of disciplining a defiant child.Teaching your child these components of good
If your child exhibits defiant behavior, you'll need tobehavior will help him or her learn to be more
realize that while your child isn't perfect, neither are yourespectful, and will improve the quality of your
as a parent. Learn how to be right kind of parent forrelationship.
your child instead of trying to be a parent for a very