Effective Parenting For Your Child's Temper Tantrums

It is important for parents to know how to interveneConsistency is extremely important, as you actually
when their child has emotional meltdowns. What youreinforce negative behavior when you are inconsistent.
do in those moments can make a significant differenceAppropriate consequences are usually linked to the
in how the child learns to deal with disappointment,child's behavior. For example, if your child starts to
conflict, or frustration.whine or demand that you buy him a toy every time
Acquiring these are essential life skills will have ayou go to the store, an appropriate consequence may
positive impact on the development of your child's selfbe that you take him home immediately. Be patient, it
esteem. Here are some effective skills that you canmay take several times before he gets the message
develop to help your child in those difficult moments:oand realizes that he needs to behave appropriately at
Become a student of your child's behavior and noticethe store.o Pay attention to your child so you can
factors that may contribute to your child's emotionalrecognize when she's beginning to show signs of
reactivity. These factors may include environmentalemotional overload or excessive stimulation. She may
circumstances such as excessive noise, crowdedseem fatigued, overactive, irritable, distant, tense,
spaces, teasing from other children, etc. Your child mayanxious, or may resort to immature behaviors that
also be reacting to internal factors such as fatigue,should tell you it's time for you to intervene. Effective
hunger, excessive stress, lack of sleep, or troublinginterventions may include giving your child a break for
emotions. It is also important to look for patterns sorest, direct her to a less stimulating activity or
you can establish effective interventions in the future.oenvironment, help her practice deep breathing, engage
Take responsibility for being in control and actingher in a relaxing conversation or activity, or talk to her
accordingly. Your job is to help your child de-escalatequietly for a while.o It's important that you remain calm
an emotional reaction that may get out of control. Yourand speak in a calm voice. Your body language needs
child looks to you to provide emotional stability duringto be congruent with this. Establishing eye contact is
these times. For example, if you notice that your childvery important when communicating with your child.
tends to have tantrums in a particular situation, youYour child will feel supported, cared for, and loved by
may need to remove him from the situation so he canyou under these circumstances.o Focus on the
regain control.o Prepare a plan of action that isconnection between you and your child. Concerning
effective and supportive. Talk to your child about whatyourself with what other people may think of you or
you have noticed and inform him of your plan. Be clearyour child is not a priority. If you are in public places you
and concise when communicating new rules andmay tell yourself "There's a really good chance I'll
interventions you will use. Get feedback from yournever see these people again in my life"o As the
child about their experiences in difficult situations andparent, you need to take control and handle the
what he thinks may be helpful to do at such times. Besituation one-on-one. Allowing others to intervene may
clear and concise when communicating your plan oronly contribute to your child become more reactive, as
new rules to your child. Using too many words orthey may feel exposed or picked on.o Review the
repeating yourself will only serve to confuse him.osituation briefly with your child once he's calm again.
Write down your plan or rules in simple form. Find anThese can be valuable teachable moments that may
appropriate time when you can review them with yourhelp him remember how to behave more appropriately
child.next time. Be sure and give your child positive
You may want to post these in a visible place. Gofeedback for any progress he's is making, however
over these before he's exposed to situations wheresmall, as this will help both of you remember that this is
he may go on overload and experience tempera process of successive approximations toward the
tantrums.o Give your child positive feedback when hedesired behavior.o Be sure and seek assistance from
follows these rules. This actually helps increase thea professional counselor who treats children if things
chances that the positive behavior will re-occur in thedon't improve with time. Your child may be having
future. You may also want to reward your child bypsychological, social, or neurological, problems he
giving him an extra privilege, such as extra play time ordoesn't know how to communicate about. Keep in
by playing his favorite game with him.o Come up withmind that as a parent you may also need help from a
a list of appropriate consequences for your child whenprofessional. If you take care of yourself your child will
he doesn't follow the rules, and apply them consistently.benefit from it.