| Do any of these ring true with the situation with a | | | | his parents. |
| teenager in your home? | | | | While many male adults of my generation attribute |
| "Our family cannot live like this any longer." | | | | their time in the military with turning them into a "man," |
| "Everyone runs for cover when he comes home." | | | | there are few similarities and more things to consider |
| "I can't sit by and watch him destroy himself." | | | | when it comes to putting a troubled teen in such an |
| "We've got to do something to help him before he | | | | environment. The first dissimilarity is that teens |
| becomes an adult." | | | | recruited into the military are usually a few years older, |
| When teens exhibit unhealthy patterns of behavior | | | | and that can make all the difference (even a few |
| which are far beyond those of normal adolescence, | | | | months can make a difference for a teen). Secondly, |
| such as persistent lying, selfishness, deceitfulness, | | | | in the military we either elected to be there or were |
| manipulation, entitlement, depression, lack of motivation, | | | | drafted by the government, not forced to go there by |
| cutting, suicidal thoughts, illegal behavior, or running | | | | our parents. Think about that difference in the mindset |
| away, their actions could be linked to other root | | | | of a scared and confused teen. And thirdly, recruits in |
| causes. For instance, the after affects of childhood | | | | the military get to the other side of their training with a |
| abuse, a split in the home, a death of a loved one, or | | | | sense of accomplishment and pride, ready to take on |
| just a chemical or hormonal imbalance. That's why it is | | | | the world as a member of a big powerful institution. |
| important to determine the root causes of behavioral | | | | Teens in boot camps often return home defeated, |
| problems before choosing a solution, if the parent is | | | | disenfranchised and without purpose. |
| considering options outside of the home. | | | | So, is it better to just send such a troubled teen to a |
| Regardless of the causes, if parents don't act to | | | | typical boarding school. After all, it is often the chosen |
| change the downward spiral, their teen's life could be in | | | | alternative. Unfortunately, most boarding schools are |
| jeopardy. So, action usually must be swift and decisive. | | | | not set up to handle troubled teens. A parent can |
| Two of several options include boot camps (including | | | | place a child in a normal boarding school and hope for |
| wilderness programs or some military-style progams) | | | | the best, but this isn't what I would recommend, since |
| or a more therapeutic approach through a boarding | | | | most such teens will all too soon be kicked out or |
| school designed to deal with psychological and | | | | simply run away. |
| emotional issues. So, what are the differences | | | | So what is the right answer? That depends on your |
| between these programs and what might be the best | | | | situation, and your financial ability. I recommend that you |
| option for your family? | | | | seek counsel from a qualified teen counselor and a |
| Boot camps originated as an alternative to jail or | | | | psychologist (both) before deciding anything in regard |
| juvenile detention for errant adolescents. In some | | | | to a residential program for your teen. |
| cases, these facilities can be a starting place for | | | | The option that I usually recommend is somewhere |
| getting your teen help, when defiance and lack of | | | | between the two. For a troubled teen with clear |
| respect for authority are the main characteristic of the | | | | emotional issues or losses in his or her life, a |
| child's behavior. In both the state and private | | | | specialized Christian boarding school set up to deal |
| environment the camp's goal is usually to either "scare | | | | with troubled teens may be the answer. Such |
| kids straight" or to pull them out of their comfortable | | | | therapeutic programs are few, but they are developed |
| environment long enough for there to be a change of | | | | to focus on the child's mental and behavioral state |
| heart. | | | | while at the same time continuing their education and |
| Parents often seek out boot camps and military | | | | offering a regimented schedule and duties. Unlike boot |
| schools with the assumption that a "wake up call" is all | | | | camps, however, these programs are designed to be |
| that is needed for their troubled teen. However, many | | | | relational and loving. They also show the teen that |
| times the issues are much deeper than the parent | | | | rules are important and are unbending in that regard. If |
| understands, including what we've already mentioned, | | | | the rules are not followed, then there are |
| such as hidden childhood abuse or a chemical | | | | consequences, real consequences, but hopefully not |
| imbalance, which obviously cannot be "scared straight." | | | | physical. |
| Boot camps are usually short-term and very | | | | If you are considering a therapeutic program, you |
| regimented in style, including military exercises and | | | | should ask what their policy is in regard to corporal |
| intense physical training and "in your face" supervision, | | | | punishment before you place your child there. For |
| focusing on reality, respect and responsibility. Many | | | | instance, I've always found that "good" consequences |
| teens lack these qualities, yet they desperately need | | | | are when a teen may lose a privilege they hold dear, |
| them in order to successfully transition into adulthood. | | | | or they may not advance to the next level (which has |
| This experience can help some defiant teens replace | | | | more privileges or prestige) as soon, or they may be |
| destructive attitudes and behaviors with new | | | | required to do some light work to think about their |
| perspectives and direction in their lives. The concept is | | | | error. |
| that a "quick reality check" will turn a child around who | | | | The better Christian boarding schools with a |
| has been acting out. These boot camp style programs | | | | therapeutic approach have a high ratio of staff to |
| are usually ineffective for teens that have developed | | | | students, sometimes as many as one staff member |
| bad habits over a long period of time and are in need | | | | for each student on campus. Each student is assigned |
| of long term change. | | | | a specialized counselor, attends focus groups and the |
| Most teen boot camps include drills, hard work, | | | | activities are specifically designed to build self-esteem |
| uniforms, and a "yes sir" and "no sir" mentality. They | | | | and improve behavioral issues. |
| are a very structured environment that includes the drill | | | | A therapeutic program and approach within a Christian |
| instructors getting right in the face of the cadets, similar | | | | boarding school is a good choice for many teen |
| to an adult military boot camp. Barracks are usually | | | | behavioral issues. In Christian boarding schools of this |
| similar to the military as well, including bunk beds, foot | | | | nature, teens will learn to determine what their |
| lockers and a very strict system of inspections that | | | | weaknesses are and how it affects their behavior, and |
| must be completed without error. | | | | how to grow the opposing virtue which will help |
| Whether a teen is able to handle this type of | | | | eliminate their destructive behaviors. |
| environment is actually a question that must be | | | | When situations of divorce, death, abuse, social |
| considered before a parent puts a struggling teen in | | | | difficulties, academic struggles, adoption issues, or |
| the midst of these intense drill instructors and within the | | | | victimization and unhealthy patterns of dealing with |
| environment that does not permit individuality, or any | | | | those issues a therapeutic Christian boarding school |
| outside contact for a prescribed period of time. | | | | can offer a safe and life-changing alternative to boot |
| Parents should consider whether juvenile boot camps | | | | camps, military academies, and wilderness programs. |
| are the right choice for a troubled teen. Teens with | | | | If your teen is suffering from a loss or other emotional |
| behavioral problems that are side-effects of deeper | | | | distress, or he is a good kid that just needs to get |
| issues should not be considered for teen boot camps, | | | | away from destructive peers, I recommend that you |
| sice that may only serve to drive the problems deeper | | | | seek out a Christian boarding school with a therapeutic |
| and separate the child further from the relationship with | | | | approach. |