| The ideas behind behavior modification for children go | | | | specific actions. |
| back at least as far as concepts written about in the | | | | 1) Focus primarily on your relationship with your child. |
| early 1900's by Edward Thorndike. Understanding and | | | | No technique will replace a strong, influence based |
| applying these ideas has grown and changed through | | | | relationship with your child. Absent the relationship, |
| research conducted by a number of psychologists and | | | | techniques become control strategies rather than |
| behavioral analysts since. B.F. Skinner, one of the most | | | | influence strategies. |
| widely known proponents of behavior modification | | | | 2) Learn the principle that lies behind the technique. |
| techniques, discussed the concepts in his works on | | | | Every technique that works is based on some key |
| operant conditioning. | | | | principle applied within certain parameters and in a |
| Basically, behavior modification for children applies | | | | certain context. When you understand the underlying |
| parenting techniques that attempt to mold, or shape, a | | | | principles, you can adjust the technique as the situation |
| child's behavior through reinforcement or the lack of it. | | | | calls for it rather than rigidly applying it to every event. |
| Proponents claim that, behavior modification strategies | | | | |
| for children can result in: | | | | Behavior Modification Mistake #2 - Inconsistent |
| * Fairly rapid behavior change. | | | | application. |
| * More appropriate behaviors and fewer inappropriate | | | | If you decide that you want to apply behavior |
| behaviors. | | | | modification techniques with your children, decide to |
| * Greater clarity of understanding between parents | | | | apply them consistently. If you |
| and children. | | | | * Change the rules frequently, or |
| Critics claim that these parenting techniques can lead | | | | * Only apply the techniques when you have the |
| to: | | | | energy,you will get bad results. |
| * A significant negative impact on the parent-child | | | | In order to gain the greatest positive benefit from |
| relationship. | | | | behavior modification techniques, you need to |
| * Robbing children of internal motivation by teaching | | | | consistently apply them. As you work to consistently |
| them to respond only to external motivation. | | | | apply the techniques, balance your effort to be |
| * Teaching children to "game the system" by behaving | | | | consistent with a solid understanding of the principles |
| appropriately only when rewarded. | | | | behind the techniques that you are applying. |
| As parents, we have found that a balanced application | | | | (Remember point number two under Behavior |
| of behavior modification techniques can work incredibly | | | | Modification Mistake #1!) |
| well when you are working to teach your child how to | | | | Behavior Modification Mistake #3 - Expecting results |
| behave appropriately. We have also found that total | | | | too quickly. |
| reliance on behavior modification techniques without | | | | If you are working with your child to change an |
| blending other concepts into your parenting can create | | | | undesirable behavior, remember that they probably |
| the negative results cautioned about by critics of the | | | | developed the undesirable behavior because they |
| approach. | | | | received some kind of reward (from their perspective, |
| In order to gain the benefits of applying behavior | | | | not yours) for that behavior. So, changing that behavior |
| modification for children while minimizing the potential | | | | will require that they learn to expect a different |
| negative implications, we recommend that you | | | | outcome. In this case, learning something new will |
| understand the common mistakes that parents make | | | | require them to unlearn something else. Give them |
| and what you can do to avoid making them. | | | | some time to adjust, focus on your relationship, and |
| Behavior Modification Mistake #1 - Over reliance on a | | | | remain consistent. |
| single technique to teach your child. | | | | We are not psychologists, psychiatrists, counselors, or |
| We have seen many well-intentioned parents attempt | | | | social workers. We do not claim to be expert in every |
| to implement a "technique" as a way to teach their | | | | area of understanding this topic. We are simply |
| children without taking the time to really understand | | | | parents and business professionals who have studied |
| why the techniques works, when the technique works, | | | | and applied what we have learned along the way. We |
| and in what context the technique works. We have | | | | know what has worked for us, and we offer these |
| found that no technique works in every situation. Some | | | | suggestions in the hopes that our lessons will help you |
| work well one time and not so well at a different time. | | | | as well. |
| In order to avoid this mistake, we recommend two | | | | |