| versation around child rearing has turned to | | | | teachers got reprimanded by his parents for marking |
| overindulgence, self-absorption, and entitlement. Is the | | | | his papers with red pen, and where he played sports |
| generation just now hitting adulthood, overly entitled? | | | | poorly but his parents told him he was a |
| Do young people feel that they can lay claim to | | | | superstar so as not to damage his self-esteem: |
| whatever they fancy? Are parents raising children | | | | imagine his shock when he receives his first term |
| who feel that they need not earn what they want; be | | | | paper in college covered in red pen with a big D at the |
| it good grades, possessions, skills or jobs? Do children | | | | top. |
| respect authority? | | | | Imagine the dismay of the twenty-three year old job |
| Jeffrey Zaslow wrote an interesting article in the Wall | | | | seeker who expects her entry-level salary to be that |
| Street Journal titled, The Entitlement Epidemic: | | | | of an experienced expert. Out of college she runs up |
| Who’s Really to Blame, in which he | | | | thousands and thousand of dollars in debt because |
| discusses this topic and cites some speculative | | | | she believes that she deserves things that she |
| reasons why children feel so entitled. He notes three | | | | can’t afford. |
| possible causes for the twenty-something | | | | How does the mother feel who has worked like a dog |
| generation’s overly inflated sense of self: | | | | to give her children everything that she didn’t |
| indulgent parenting, consumer culture and the | | | | have as a child, and her children are not satisfied and |
| self-esteem movement. | | | | want more and more and more? Or the father whose |
| Is it okay for children to be self-absorbed and overly | | | | every conversation with his daughter is punctuated |
| entitled? | | | | repeatedly by her use of the word I? |
| In a survey taken of the over 35 set, the response to | | | | Parents who overindulge certainly do not set out with |
| the above question was a unified and resolute, no. It | | | | the intention of raising entitled children; they are |
| is mind numbingly boring to be with people totally | | | | probably unaware that they are doing it. It is a struggle |
| self-absorbed, and working or living with the entitled is | | | | in our current culture to say no, to deny, to push, or to |
| draining and depleting. exclaimed one participant. | | | | discipline. Some parents fear that if they parent |
| So what is going on with parents? Do they see that | | | | incorrectly they could psychologically damage their |
| by overindulging they are causing harm to their kids? | | | | children, causing depression, drug abuse, broken |
| How hard is it for parents to stop overindulging? | | | | relationships, and failure to succeed. Some may worry |
| Now is a difficult time for parents to be raising children. | | | | that if they discipline, their children will hate them. Others |
| The introduction of the Internet has allowed material | | | | enjoy their kids so much they would rather just be |
| into homes that the parents and children of just ten | | | | friends, and there are those who parent out of guilt for |
| years ago did not have to contend with. My Space, | | | | reasons such as divorce or loss. |
| You Tube, and other social networking sites | | | | Successful parents take a proactive role in their |
| encourage self-absorption. Children spend hours | | | | children’s lives. They set limits around spending |
| posting photos and descriptions of their daily minutiae. | | | | and other requests, and manage children’s |
| The me, me, me focus is further encouraged by | | | | expectations. They establish strict boundaries around |
| television programs, commercials, print ads and movies | | | | computer use, especially social networking sites that |
| that sexualize children, promote indiscriminate spending | | | | keep children inwardly focused. These parents create |
| and value fame without talent. Kids emulate talent-less | | | | the child’s reality instead of allowing kids to view |
| fame seekers like Paris Hilton. Children have learned | | | | a skewed reality through different media channels. |
| that life is all about them, their looks, their needs, their | | | | Effective parents teach kids that there is a clear |
| wants. Clothing stores sell adult styles, like thongs, belly | | | | difference between children and adults; that by virtue |
| shirts and make-up to very young children, blurring the | | | | of education, hard work, age and experience, adults |
| line between adult and child. Society has further | | | | are to be afforded respect. They emphasize the truth |
| compounded the problem by making it taboo for | | | | that children are not on a level playing field with their |
| parents to discipline, teachers to grade and coaches to | | | | parents, teachers, instructors or coaches. |
| score for fear of damaging self-esteem. Every kick of | | | | The time will come quickly for children when, after |
| a ball, small line drawing or block tower is lauded as | | | | having paid their dues, they can make all of their own |
| genius in the eyes of today’s parents. | | | | choices. If parents start early by instilling good values, |
| How is this current paradigm of value to kids? | | | | modeling decent and loving behavior, and teaching |
| Get into the head of the college freshman with the | | | | respect, then their children will grow up to make smart |
| inflated sense of self. If he was raised in a school | | | | choices, develop compassion for others, and |
| system that refused to give real grades, where | | | | appreciate the deeper meaning of life. |