| Tired, frustrated, and overwhelmed are three words | | | | good communication. Respectful communication is |
| that every parent is intimately familiar with when it | | | | your immediate short term goal. This is a process. This |
| comes to dealing with a defiant teen. It is no small task | | | | will not happen overnight, but things can change for the |
| to deal with a teen who repeatedly doesn't listen to | | | | better. Consider these 5 tips when dealing with your |
| you and, who is constantly disrespectful. What are the | | | | defiant teen: |
| reasons they are acting this way? Well, there may be | | | | 1. Focus |
| several different reasons. | | | | What is your goal? Ultimately your goal is to get your |
| It's impossible for any article to pinpoint the exact | | | | teen to stop their defiant behavior. Your goal is not to |
| cause of your child's bad behavior. However, there are | | | | let them know how much you are frustrated by the |
| some things to consider. Does the child have bi-polar | | | | way they are behaving. |
| or depression issues? Perhaps there are other mental | | | | 2. Breathe |
| diagnosis that are playing a role. If this is the case, | | | | Don't forget to breathe! When we get anxious or |
| please work with your child's doctor to find a good | | | | angry, our breaths become short and shallow. Taking |
| combination of medication that works. Psychotropic | | | | just 5 minutes to focus on the breath will slow your |
| drugs react differently for different people. | | | | breathing down, and you will begin to feel more calm. |
| Experimenting with different medications may take | | | | 3. Relax |
| care of the problem all together. | | | | Go for a walk, or jog. Ride your bike, or jump some |
| However, medication is not the magic cure-all for bad | | | | rope. Get the energy out. When you are focused so |
| behavior. I'll bet that you have wore yourself out trying | | | | much on your thoughts, doing something physical can |
| to think of reasons why your teen acts out in a defiant | | | | be of immense benefit. This will help get the energy |
| manner. Maybe it's time for a fresh perspective. When | | | | out, and will increase endorphins. Endorphins will make |
| your teen is being defiant toward you, how are your | | | | you feel better. This will help you to relax and stay |
| actions playing in to this behavior? I know, I know. | | | | calm. |
| "What do you mean my actions?" Nobody is calling | | | | 4. Take Care of Yourself |
| you a bad parent, or saying this situation is your fault. | | | | Extreme amounts of stress can reek havoc on one's |
| But, it is worth examining this point. We can't control | | | | immune system. Stress related illnesses are at an all |
| anyone. We can't force someone to act in a certain | | | | time high in the Western world. Make sure you are |
| manner, or to do anything they don't want to do. | | | | eating good food, and moving your body everyday. |
| Children are also people. It is not a given that your | | | | Food is the fuel that powers both body and mind. |
| children will respect you, no matter how many times | | | | Make sure you are giving your body good fuel. |
| that you tell them they need to. | | | | 5. Never Give Up |
| Can you imagine saying the same thing to an adult? | | | | You can do this. You can do anything. Human beings |
| They would look at you like you were insane, and | | | | are capable of so much more than we realize. Trust |
| most likely do every thing in their power to avoid you. | | | | the fact that you can do this. Trust the fact that your |
| Respect is a two way street. Your child must earn | | | | child can do this as well. Through the hardest of times, |
| your respect, but you must also earn theirs. This may | | | | never give up. All situations are impermanent. This one |
| seem radical to some of you. I assure you it is not | | | | is no different. |
| radical. Along with trust, respect is the cornerstone of | | | | |