| Title: Surviving Perfection - confessions of a desperate | | | | my desire forperfectionism was making it difficult for |
| housewife | | | | me to enjoy it. |
| | | | Sometimes I got so caught up in taking care of |
| Word count: 625; 65 characters per line | | | | everyone elsein the family that I barely had time for |
| Terms for reprint: | | | | myself. How easyit was to get resentful and even |
| 1. You must publish the article AS IS. Do not modify, | | | | angry! In those days Inever thought about what I |
| alter or edit it. | | | | wanted in my life. Hard tobelieve but I'm not sure at |
| 2. The author's resource box must accompany the | | | | that time I even knew what wasfun for me! |
| article at all times. | | | | Perhaps I was an extreme example in a different |
| 3. The link/s must be active or clickable. | | | | world. (Thisall happened in the late 60s and early 70s,) |
| 4. Notifying the author is not required, but doing so is | | | | Instead today |
| appreciated. | | | | I hear mother's talk about thinking about their kids |
| Surviving Perfection - confessions of a desperate | | | | whilethey are at work and their work while they are |
| housewife | | | | home with thekids. That has to be draining too. Ask |
| By Alvah Parker | | | | any mother to makea list of the people in her life who |
| Recently I read an article about an attorney who | | | | are most important and |
| tookpaternity leave so his wife (also an attorney) could | | | | I'll bet she doesn't even think about putting her own |
| go backto work. He was a stay-at-home Dad from | | | | nameon the list! |
| the time his sonwas 3 months until his son was 9 | | | | Both mothers and fathers want to bring their full |
| months. The articledetailed how the attorney initially | | | | energyinto their parenting. One way to make sure you |
| was sure he would havetime during the day to read, | | | | do that isto ask yourself, "Where am I losing my |
| study, and write while his newson napped. Instead he | | | | energy?" Some of themost common places are: lack |
| found his schedule exhausting withlittle time to rest. His | | | | of self care, too much debt,trying to be perfect, and |
| law practice looked easy comparedto this! | | | | work guilt. |
| Parenting whether for an infant, toddler or teenager | | | | Once you are aware of your own energy deficiencies |
| takesan enormous amount of energy. Sometimes it is | | | | it istime to make a plan to do something about them. |
| physicalenergy as with a baby or young child and | | | | Sometimesthe answer of what to do is obvious and |
| sometimes it ismental energy as with a teenager. | | | | taking action easy. |
| As a young parent it didn't occur to me to complain to | | | | If not then get some help. There are parenting |
| myfriends or family that I felt disillusioned about the | | | | groups,coaches, therapists, and financial advisors who |
| wholemotherhood bit. I loved my children and wanted | | | | can offeradvice and support. The next step is up to |
| to be a | | | | you. |
| "perfect mother". That meant cooking, cleaning, | | | | About Alvah Parker |
| playing,disciplining etc. all perfectly. To keep that sort | | | | Alvah Parker is a Business and Career Coach as well |
| ofappearance up is extremely tiring. Do I sound a bit | | | | aspublisher of Parker's Points, an email tip list and Road |
| like a | | | | to |
| "Desperate Housewife"?! | | | | Success, an ezine. Her clients are managers, |
| My own behavior was not the best role model for my | | | | businessowners, sole practioners, attorneys and |
| ownchildren. Thank goodness they survived my | | | | people intransition. Alvah is found on the web at |
| overindustriousness! | | | | She may also be reached at 781-598-0388. To learn |
| Actively choosing what we want to spend our energy | | | | moreabout parenting issues go to the website for tips |
| on is animportant life lesson. I had a picture of a | | | | and ideas about parenting. |
| perfect motherin my head and I was trying to be that | | | | The site also offers conference calls for mothers |
| model. There was alot about motherhood I did like but | | | | andfathers to share their parenting issues and ideas. |