Parenting Resources: How to Get the Advice You Need

Raising children is both exhilarating and exhausting.your children to understand and they will be more likely
There are times when even the seasoned veteransto comply. It will also aid them in developing their own
need a little parenting advice. Many parents lack thereasoning skills.
self esteem to trust their own judgment when it comeActively participate in activities with your children that
to raising their children. They just need a little backup.extend outside of the home. Go places with them,
With all the parenting books, videos and classeshave family nights which may involve dinner and a
available, parents have a plethora of parentingmovie. Also, schedule some one-on-one time with
resources available. The question is, which type ofeach child. This will enrich your relationship with your
parenting resource works for me and for my child?children and is a great esteem builder for the child.
We are all different, every child as well as everyWatch how you phrase your directions to your
parent. With this in mind, you should choose yourchildren. Don't ask, tell. There are ways to handle giving
sources for parenting advice carefully keeping yourdirections that don't make you sound like a dictator,
child's needs, your family's needs and your needs inbossing them to "do this" and "do that." You should
sight. The best thing you can do is review all thebegin your instruction in such as way that is firm but
solutions to find what may work for you. It may involvenot offensive. Instead of "take out the trash," try,
some trial and error at first, but you can find parenting"Jimmy, I need you to take out the trash before you
resources that are right for you.go outside, please." You have instructed what must be
There are some basic parenting tips that apply todone, set a boundary and said please. The child feels
most any situation and most families. You may wantmore respected. And don't forget to say thank you
to start here.when he does the task per your specifications. If he
Tell your children that you love them. Don't just buydoes it, but it was done poorly or he missed something,
them things and hope that they get the message.deliver the criticism using the "sandwich method." Begin
"Stuff" does not replace the love of a parent. Tell themwith something positive about the job he did, "You took
and show them with lots of hugs.out the trash in the kitchen and even picked up the
Get involved in your children's lives. Know where theytrash that had fallen on the floor. Thanks!" Follow that
go, who they go with, what they do. Know their friends,with the criticism, "But I needed you to get the trash in
know what they like and dislike. Attend their concerts,the bathroom as well. Go ahead and grab that now,
sporting event, plays and other activities. Show yourplease." Then follow with another positive comment, "I
children that you are interested in them.really appreciate that you are so cooperative when I
Get your children involved in family discussions. Allowask you to do something." It is an old management
them to offer input on family decisions, help findtechnique that works great with kids.
solutions to family problems and offer suggestions forNetwork with other parents and you will likely be
family activities and rules. This will make you child feelsurprised to find that they too share many of your
like a valued family member and increase their selfjoys and frustrations as a parent with their own
esteem.children. Other parents can be great parenting
Don't fall into the "because I said so" or "because I amresources and can direct you to parenting books,
the parent" trap. Explain to your children why you setvideos or other resources to help you become a
certain rules or make certain decisions. This will allowbetter parent.