| Grandparents have raised their own children, worked | | | | dparentinggreat.comaarp.org/families/grandparents |
| hard throughout their lives, survived many hardships | | | | On the surface, being a grandparent raising a |
| and have more than earned the right to relax in a | | | | grandchild isn't very much different from being a parent |
| golden glow of retirement. However there is an | | | | the first time. As with your own children, being a parent |
| increasing trend of grandparents becoming parents | | | | the second time requires love and caring, a firm |
| again, raising their children's children, or in some cases, | | | | attitude and nearly endless patience. However, raising |
| even their great-grandchildren. In fact, there are | | | | children for the second (or third) time can also be one |
| currently 4.5 million children being raised by | | | | of the most rewarding experiences in your life. |
| grandparents in the United States alone, according to | | | | A firm hand and discipline are also a necessity when it |
| the U.S. Census Bureau. That is more children being | | | | comes to raising grandchildren. Too many |
| raised by grandparents than there are children in the | | | | grandparents are more lenient on their grandchildren, |
| entire foster care system. | | | | either because the feel badly about the situation that |
| Whether due to financial problems, lack of stability, | | | | the grandchild is in, or because they wish to correct |
| non-interest, or other problems on behalf of the | | | | mistakes they made with their own children. It is |
| parents, many grandparents find themselves in the | | | | important to remember that all children need guidance |
| unique position of raising small children in the golden | | | | and discipline, and that if you approach it from the |
| years of their lives. This can prove to bring its own set | | | | standpoint of providing the best care possible, which |
| of unique challenges and rewards, some more | | | | includes being firm yet loving, you will be not only |
| unexpected than others. | | | | making the child's life better but your own life easier. |
| Some grandparents may feel embarrassed or hesitant | | | | It is also important to take some time to relax and |
| to seek custody of their grandchildren in court, not | | | | enjoy the time you have with your grandchildren. |
| wanting to go up against their own children legally. It is | | | | Especially since most grandparents do not have a |
| never an easy situation, and even though the parents | | | | full-time job as they had with their own children, you |
| of the child are seldom around, the grandparents may | | | | now have plenty of time to have fun with and spend |
| not wish to cause further trouble in an already troubled | | | | time with, your grandchildren. You are now free to |
| situation. For this reason, some grandparents may | | | | enjoy spending time with them, listening to them, and |
| even be raising their grandchildren without full or even | | | | helping them with homework, problem-solving, reading, |
| temporary custody rights. | | | | or other activities. |
| Many times, this situation is unexpected and unplanned, | | | | But it is also important to realize that even |
| leading to financial difficulties as well as frustration and | | | | grandparents need a break at times. Be sure to take |
| anxiety. Many second-time parents are on a limited | | | | time for yourself each day, away from the child |
| income or social security, which makes the situation | | | | children, even if it is just a warm bath at the end of the |
| more difficult, as there is also a tendency to want to | | | | day, or a book before bed. Make sure you have time |
| overspend on your grandchildren. Be sure that you | | | | to relax and unwind from the stresses of the day, and |
| have a proper budget planned out and that you don't | | | | you may even need a few days vacation every now |
| overspend in unnecessary areas such as toys, games | | | | and then. If possible, see if there is someone |
| and activities. | | | | trustworthy and reliable you can leave the |
| Another important part of being a second-time parent | | | | grandchildren with for a day or two every once in a |
| is to make certain that you have a solid support | | | | while for you to be able to re-energize and relax. |
| system behind you. In many towns, there are special | | | | If you take things in stride, and have fun spending time |
| support group meetings especially for your situation. | | | | with and caring for your grandchildren, you will find that |
| There are also many different resources available on | | | | being a second-time parent can be immensely |
| the internet. A few of these | | | | enjoyable, and not just a stressful situation. |